Best Weekend EVER!

Apparently my host family has been thinking I am a lonely young man because after returning from school one cold winter day, they rushed to my side and said with excited eyes “Dustin!!!! We have a wonderful surprise waiting for you outside. She is all yours” Now this addition of a she confused me at first until I stepped out into the bright sunlight reflecting off of her pale skin only to see the wonderful SnowWoman built with love just for me. They said now I can finally get a girl and it is actually the perfect girl because when you get sick of her she will probably just melt away.

Despite my newfound love, I had commitments to keep and off I went to a new land were adventures were to be had a wars were to be fought. For we all know that in any good drama the only thing to separate two star struck lovers is a battle between good and evil. Yet, in this case it was between the tourists and the scam artists.
My travels began on a Thursday with me battling sloppy sidewalks in order to arrive promptly at my train traversing the glistening countryside with its destination in sight: Paris, France. I was stoked. Yet, I was a bit on the weary side for I had heard that the French men are not big fans of the Americans because apparently we were only supposed to borrow the statue of liberty for a period of 24.7 years so that they would be able to stand lady liberty besides the Eiffel tower in order to create the world’s greatest tourist attraction. Yet, as the story goes, the American’s were quite fond of this statue and decided to fool the French by spray painting it green and pretending they replaced it with a new one and sent the original back. Still, this claim is under suspicion being as it has still not arrived on French soil. If you ask me I would back the American side of things and blame it on the insane taxes you have to pay to get something imported into this continent. If my friend’s Euro-rail pass cost her 230 euros to get imported imagine the Statue of Liberty! There is no way the French were going to pay such prices, and the real statue of liberty probably is sitting in storage at some international FedEx center. In the end, the French have settled for a much smaller version which resides in a hidden location which I was not able to discover, but I do promise it is there.
Anyway, they still have managed to accumulate many giant tourist attractions, and their sheer size made them amazing. From the Arc de Triumph, The massive glass pyramid at the Louvre, and then the Eiffel Tower, the city has much beauty to show off. And I spent two wonderful days soaking it all in. Our first day began with the Arc de Triumph which was amazing and not just another arc. It is ginormous, I couldn’t believe it.

Sadly it was raining that day and we were petrified that our weekend was going to be ruined so in order to forget about it we quickly escaped into the underground metro and arrived at the Louvre museum to browse some art and race around the massive building attempting to see in 5 hours what many people see in 4 days. Our attempts failed but I did get to see some awesome painting by Ruebens, the Mona Lisa of coarse (which is way too hyped up) and a few other beauties including the Wedding Feast of Cana.

We next traveled to Notre Dame. The architecture was amazing, but it was a bit odd to walk through the church with the other tourists because a Mass was actually going on as we strolled the church. I guess if you ever want to feel famous just attend Mass at Notre Dame because you will get countless pictures taken of you while you just go about your business. Or perhaps we were not supposed to be there at all and they were just too nice to tell the stupid American’s to leave. I guess both instances are completely plausible. The outer architecture was the most impressive though, and once again I turn you over to the pictures.

That night we saw one of the most impressive buildings or pieces of art or whatever you want to call it: The Eiffel Tower. It was amazing, I loved it, I stood in awe at its behemoth footings as I gazed up at it towering above me. In the night it seemed to glow with radiance and just then I was interrupted by a young man trying to sell a corny light up plastic souvenir. 20 Euro he said, and to this I laughed. How could he expect me to pay 20 euro for that, and then he lowered the price. He asked what I would pay. I promptly walked away before getting caught in some sort of trap. I have learned that the best way to avoid buying something you don’t want is just not to talk to them. These people have some serious skills that is for sure. This was my first avoidance of the scam artists. I was proud. We went to the top of the tower by the way, it was wicked awesome. You should do it sometime.

Oh, and at every hour for ten minutes it does this really cool blinking light thing. Once again, you should see it, it is worth it I promise. If it isnt I will buy you one of those little plastic light up towers.

On our way back from the tower we weaved in and out of the scam artists and avoided eye contact at all costs. Apparently the lady in front of us was not as skilled as she was seen looking into the glowing figure only to be surrounded by 5 other glowing towers each offering a lower price. Ah how superb my skills were. But oh how wrong I was once again. That following day we decided to go to Mountmontre where a beautiful church is situated on a hill overlooking the city of love. Well it sure sounded pleasant reading of it in the book, but upon arrival we were greeted by some kind Jamaican fellows telling us to give them our finger. The crowd was large and I was unable to keep walking and therefore unable to avoid his gaze. He reassured me that it was nothing bad and pointed to the many people around me doing the same thing. I gave in and he began to create a bracelet using my finger and his thread. He talked to me about something in Africa, mixed in some Jamaican stuff and even some Lion King acunama-tata. Before long he had a stupid thread bracelet tied around my wrist and told me it was 20 euros. I was like no way, he then lowered the price. I ended up paying 3 euros for him to leave me alone. Juliet paid 4. Maggie paid another 3. We all were ticked off and we all had plenty off worries contrary to the acunama-tata which they had preached.

Anyway, we enjoyed the church on the hill; we also enjoyed watching others get scammed from the top of the hill. There was also a little artistic community on this hill where sidewalk painters sold their art and others attempted to paint your portrait. It was very pleasant as soon as I forgot that I had to get scammed to get here. Touché for the good Jamaican/African scam artists, they were one up on us.
Still, as any good American, we were going to go down fighting. At least the girls with me were. On our way back down some more young men spotted us tourists descending the hill and quickly asked for our finger. The only response they received was Maggie’s fist in the air revealing the 3 euro thread bracelet accompanied by Maggie yelling “It’s a Scam, a SCAM I TELL YOU!” They quickly backed off but Maggie was not so amused. Before long Maggie and Juliet noticed some other men trying to convince more unsuspecting tourists to provide their finger. Before I could stop them Maggie and Juliet were yelling for tourists not to give them the finger for it was a scam. I quickly put my head down and kept walking only to hear a few French words fly through the air. I laughed hard. Touché for the American’s I think that at least makes us even :-)
That evening we returned to the Eiffel Tower and just enjoyed its beauty one more time before saying goodbye. Apparently the romance of the place had intoxicated the girls because suddenly the cheap light up Eiffel towers became irresistible, they just had to have them. Therefore Maggie made up a very extravagant story and decided to see just how cheap she could get it for. She got him down to 3 euros. She was stoked, and Juliet was super jealous, and therefore she made an attempt to attain the prize for the same price. Still, if you would have listened to Juliet’s bartering skills you would have noticed they were lacking (actually pathetic). Anyway, Maggie had to pull the story on some other helpless young man and before long she attained two towers for 3 dollars each. They were thrilled and apparently had pulled a scam over the scam artists themselves. It was as we were walking home and the girls were giggling about their new purchases that I heard some fellow Americans talking to each other on their way to the tower about how they couldn’t believe that guy offered to sell them the light up towers for 3 euros. Who scammed who? Perhaps we will never know.
Early the next morning I entered the metro only to see 3 ruffians scamming vending machines by kicking them with violent force. Being the only other person yet waiting for a train I was rather uncomfortable. Yet, I was thankful any food they would attempt to kick out of me wouldn’t taste so good so I reasoned I was probably in good shape of not getting violently kicked as long as I kept my mouth shut and looked away. I quickly boarded my train and took off for Geneva: the land of Calvin.

Geneva is one of the most naturally beautiful cities I have seen. The mountains were perfectly hugged by the clouds as the sun reflected off the radiant turquoise harbor. It was stunning, and from the top of St. Peters cathedral (Calvin’s Church) it was even more amazing as it was a perfect view overlooking the entire city surrounded by mountains only to have them give way to the expansive lake. Besides taking in Geneva’s natural beauty, I set out on a course pertaining to all things reformation. I got to see Calvin’s church, his chair, his pulpit, and the reformation museum in Geneva. I also got to view this old church excavation which they have discovered underneath the new Cathedral. It was pretty cool but in the end it was a bunch of old rocks with French explanations which helped me very little. The museum and church themselves were wicked awesome though. I even picked up a Calvin beer at the museum and too this day it is one of my few souvenirs besides my billions of pictures taken.
I then proceeded to the reformation wall in which the early reformers are situated in stone overlooking a beautiful park. It was a great sight, and now I can officially say I had lunch (left over bread with small amounts of peanut butter) with Jean Calvin.

Yet, all good things must come to an end and I therefore went to say goodbye to my new friend. I visited Calvin’s grave after a long search for the entrance of the graveyard (even the most simple things I make difficult). Anyway, apparently his desire to strip religion of icons applied to his grave as well as the only thing remembering his death is a small stone with the inscription of JC barely legible anymore. But it was still amazing to think of the many places I had walked that day were once walked by him as well. With this thought still new in my head I turned and headed to the station to begin my 13 hour trek back home.
I made it home all right, and without a shower for the 2nd/3rd (depending on where you start the count) day in a row I had to head strait to class. I am sure I was not the most beautiful sight to behold. But hey, the snow melting in the warm sunlight gave me reason to be in mourning. For with the dawning of the sun I knew I would never be able to properly say goodbye to my SnowWoman. She melted before I returned from my travels, but the long train rides were made bearable by my knowing that some cold low pressure system would someday return only to send my beauty my way once again when I least expect it.